Middle of the nite ramblings from home

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Got next week off for Thanksgiving and Im back at home. Yeh I know real world working ppl dont get a whole week off. Sorry bout that lol.

My dad is proud of me. I promised him a 4 pt average for my 1st semester and its gonna happen. He thinks thats important. I guess it is. Gosh Im smart haha. Or maybe its that I dont have a life hmmm. Now if I could just do something bout that "gay" and "Democrat" thing Id be the perfect son haha.

My mom is happy Im home. She keeps asking-- how come you dont come home on the weekends? I dont really know the answer to that. Mostly being home makes me feel sad, but not now because Im pretty happy.

Wow this is a dumb blog haha. Hey its the middle of the nite dont expect great thots ok? Cant sleep.

When I come home I feel like Ive gone thru some kind of time warp and Im back at a place I left behind, and that Im glad I left it behind. I dont mean my family, I just mean the life I lived here. My senior year in HS I read Thomas Wolfe "You Cant Go Home Again". Its one of those books that I dont think anybody except HS students read anymore lol. And at the time I read it I didn't understand it, but I do now. This place is only about 100 miles from C'ville but it feels like Mars. But really it hasnt changed, I have.

I remember the first time I found this place--OP--late one night playing around on porn sites. (Yes I know, youre SHOCKED!! haha)
I was totally in the closet and wow, all of a sudden I found real live cyber-gay ppl. Feels like a million years ago. By the way the pic I put up here is the 1st pic I used on my profile. And um...yeh. Young huh?

And my mom seems old. When did that happen?

Kristin is coming down from Boston tomorrow and Im pretty excited about that. My brother has trashed my old room above the garage. He hasnt changed at all and Im sort of worried bout him. He doesnt seem to care about anything. I dont understand him at all. Hes angry at something but I dont know what.

I went to see Humphrey's grave, I buried him in the back yard under a tree he used to like to climb. Nobody ever loved me like Hunphrey loved me. Thats not a joke by the way.

I hope all you guys have a great Thanksgiving.
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Now what to?

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I arranged my clothes for different days, I was feeling depressed and undressed like before. Same striped yellow half sleeved shirt worn for three days with charcoal black trousers with white sporty socks. That he did not come around today right there when I called him...like negative thing again, I drove back down the lane!
He had something else in his mind better did not find out. I strolled into the bit too early morning walk for two minutes for I again hurried back!
Though I am wasting no time to get back to my friends, getting their advice down to the last details as what to say and how to utter a word as last resort to my lustful life, I am not worried at all as I love my own things, the fact many people are too eager to to roll in me their unnnecessary advice!
I don't have to look back, rather I would be looking forward to things in life I am sticking to so I love. I am dreaming I would be out in some distant land where no people with fucked up sense prevail!
So I have to be lesser of evil myself in full glare...!
As I blog this I flip out memories held in a closed compartment... I ruffle my hair and feel that emptiness reflected in the mirrored glazing...I have built some castles in the air!
Here is one from the past blogs unearthed about the shrine in the forest I was talking about...(damned.. taking too long to that page)

"I opted for this figure in the forest, knowing his well-defined object. Loose Clothes... Horn Penetrates... Only he occupied the place beside I provided the homelike seat. And considered options whether to freeze reclining on the place or a natural penetration of horn were to manifest. In the woods it was inspiring to watch as he advanced and remained held together; draped with loose wears torn up at places with the brushing of thorny bushes. Curves In Body Mass... The zealous figure wore contrasting looks as he rode over me. Playing hide and seek with curves in body mass, exploring the robust muscles, clasping hands in show of mock strength manifested the bonding further. Wish It Stayed There... His hands next to the skin, holding and patting lightly, roughed out in the sand. The bodies glistened white on the ground. Exhausted, He Returned...Only A Dream ...Once floored down one never thought to return as I was obsessed with merriment.Loss To Life I kept away from .. as long as indulgent in the figure, sneaked into their settlement and compromised in the most awful positions. Almost Vulnerable The young in
unassuming clothes took me as
I kept fluffiness in the body to merge gently and purposefully."
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